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YOU CAN ASK MISS JONES TOO!
Become a member, and Ask Miss Jones all your pressing questtions about life, love,and anything else.
Ask Miss Jones -
Well - Alexis is also a public speaker and she has done PLENTY of work with young women in the last few months. These questions were actually submitted by some of the wonderful students at her recent presentations in Austin this April.
One of my girlfriends is always jealous of me and can never be happy for me. What should I do about it?
I think it’s sad when girls forget we’re ON THE SAME TEAM!! I’m so sorry to hear your friend is having a hard time and getting jealous of you, but there are two things to look at here. One, it means that you are kicking butt in life and you can look at jealousy kind of as a compliment in a way (I’m trying to find the silver lining here). And two, jealousy more often than not has nothing to do with YOU and everything to do with the person who’s jealous.
Now I don’t know all the details of the situation, but in the past when I have had a jealous girlfriend, I would just ask her if we could grab coffee or lunch and sit down and talk. You have no idea how many things can be figured out in a simple conversation. It will give you a chance to ask her if there is anything she’s been upset about lately and give her a chance to express herself.
After you hear her out, then you have an opportunity to tell her how her behavior is negatively affecting your relationship and if there is anything you can do from your end to help the situation. I’m so much more about looking at my own actions in a situation than pointing fingers at someone else. Then once you both are able to talk and explain the situation from your point of view, you can see if the friendship can be mended.
Hopefully it can be mended but if, for some reason, she simply cannot be happy for you EVER and she is always resentful, upset and makes you feel bad for kicking butt in life, then I’d say don’t be afraid to gracefully walk away from the friendship. I truly believe that your girlfriends are meant to encourage, uplift, inspire and be your biggest fans. I personally don’t have the time or energy to entertain people in my life who don’t make me feel good about myself. There are simply to many amazing people in the world to surround yourself with, so BE PICKY with who you CHOOSE to share your time with. Whether it’s a girlfriend, a friend or a boyfriend, you’re worth it!
If I like a boy a lot and I’m not sure if he likes me back, how should I tell him?
Haha. I had the same dilemma recently myself and I’ll tell you what, the easiest way is to just be honest. In the past, I would always tell a friend, who’d try and drop a hint, or worse just hope they could read my mind and just know, but both of those aren’t very effective and end up causing WAY more complication and drama than necessary.
I have realized that it’s SOOOO much easier when you just tell a boy that you’re interested and give him the opportunity to tell you how he feels. Because let’s be honest, he’s either going to say yes or no. If he says yes, wonderful! If he says no, then it’s nice to know and you can stop wasting your time on someone who isn’t interested in you. Also, if a guy can’t appreciate you being honest and NOT playing games, then he’s not the guy you want anyway.
There’s so much “game playing” that goes on between guys and girls and it’s such a waste of time. It takes some serious guts to be open, honest and vulnerable; but that courage is more impressive than anything else. And trust me, I’ve been on both sides of the situation. I had a guy express interest when I wasn’t and honestly, I could not have been more flattered. But I’ve also told a guy I liked him when he didn’t feel the same way and sure my feelings were hurt, but like I said before, it’s good to know so I didn’t spend another six months with an unreciprocated crush.
All in all, I truly believe life is too short to waste your time dancing around the issue and that doesn’t just go for boys you have crushes on. It’s so much easier to just tell people how you feel and you can avoid SO much miscommunication. It may be scary sometimes, but in the end it’s totally worth it!
